Did you know that we are designed to BE a gift at Christmas and all the rest of the year? We are to aim to be a grace gift in every relationship, and if we do not begin at home, it is fake other places. Our marriage is the primary training field to practice the grace of kindness.
One of the problems in living this out is our self-centeredness. We only see others’ behaviors and not our own. We excuse ourselves and blame them when strife rears its head. Taking responsibility for our own contribution to the event, even when we think we are right, is evidence of His grace working in us.
I know that there are times we have all wondered, “Did they know how selfish that sounded”? The better questions are: “Did I speak my heart with mercy and grace toward them? Did I cause their defensive reaction?” The Word is a mirror where we see ourselves reflected. We also see ourselves reflected in the eyes and responses of our spouse and children. If there is a repeated pattern, we can humbly ask for input and ask the Holy Spirit to help us to see ourselves clearly.
In the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23), we get some direct help. In this pattern of three threes, the first three describe our relationship with the Lord, the second three our relationships with others, and the third, character traits we should require of ourselves at all times. If we have as our goal, PATIENCE, KINDNESS AND GOODNESS, we will have interactions that are more peaceful in our home.
If we practice patience, we will both speak to and listen to our spouse without pressure, and take time to let him or her choose their response to us. Kindness will prevent our talking down to our beloved, and not take them for granted. If we want good things for them then we will package our interactions in goodness.. The abbreviation for “package” is PKG, and this will help us to remember to keep patience, kindness, and goodness ever active.
BE a gift from Him to your spouse. Package yourself in grace and extend mercy, throughout the Christmas Season, in honor of Him!
“See that none of you repays another with evil for evil, but always aim to show kindness and seek to do good to one another and to everybody. Be happy [in your faith] and rejoice and be glad-hearted continually”. (1 Thess 5:15-16 AMP)
Carol Gordon
Co-Founder & Director
Heart Menders Int'l, Inc.
http://www.heartmenders.org/
"Pioneering Transformational Discipleship since 1987"
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